Regret
by Vadraxia
Summary: Left in a mental state of numbness, Rangiku discovers what she is missing in life, and how far she will go to retrieve it. Spoilers for SS Arc. GinxRangiku


_"If only you had held on a little longer... Goodbye, Rangiku-san." _

The fiery haired lieutenant of the 10th squad sighed loudly, her palm pressed up against her face as she gazed out the frosted window. _"Goodbye, Gin."_

After said captain of the 3rd squad had departed alongside with the blind Tousen and the back-from-the-dead Aizen of the 5th Division, she had begun to sink into a state of rythemic depression, consisting of sloth-like movements around Soul Society. Frequently, these sloth-like movements were interrupted by large bottles of sake, leaving her in an immobile state for many hours on end (and quite often, any lieutenants that she found on the way).

It had been 9 days now. The ryoka had returned back to the living world, and the Soul Society had slowly begun to reform itself after all that had happened.

Many of the members of the 13 divisions were resting in the 4th squad's infirmary, recovering from the fights that had taken place. Kuchiki-taichou was nearly fully recovered due to the help supplied by the ryoka girl named Inoue Orihime. Before hand, the man had been near death after his encounter with the shinigami ryoka, Kurosaki Ichigo. After his fight, he had rescued his younger sister, taking a strike on his left side from Gin's zanpakutoh, Shinsou.

So many people were suffering aside from her. Kira and Shuuhei were in terrible condition now. Both of their captains had up and left without any sort of word to them. Of course, it was no secret that Hinamori was the worst of them all. Poor child, she had to deal with so much. First of all, her beloved Captain had been murdered right before her eyes, pinned up against a wall. That alone could have easily scarred someone like her for life. Then she had to get through him returning, betraying her and leaving her for dead. Yeah; she really was the luckier of the two.

Even though Soul Society was on a slight hiatus, reforming it's walls and barriers, her captain, Hitsugaya-taichou, hadn't let up on the work. Actually, because of the absences of the 3rd, 5th, and 9th squad leaders, their work load had been doubled, tripled even. She regretted the lingering feelings whenever the 3rd had been mentioned. She regretted seeing Gin in her head whenever she passed by his squad building. She regretted how she cried every night, thinking about what may have happened if she hadn't let go. If she had been lifted up alongside Gin when the Meno Grande appeared.

Letting out another sigh, Matsumoto Rangiku heard footsteps behind her. The last thing she always regretted was how whenever she heard footsteps, or sensed someone's approaching reiatsu, she would set herself up to believe that Gin might have come back. That it had all been some crazy nightmare. That he would come in and simply hold her in his arms as she cried. She always tended to be disappointed.

"Matsumoto, would you come here for a moment?" her captain's voice shattered her thoughts completely, and she turned around to meet eyes with the short, white-haired captain of the 10th divison. She stood, stifling a yawn as she pulled at her pink scarf hanging around her shoulders. He always looked away whenever he was talking to her. Perhaps it was because of her breasts. For some reason, he always had a slight blush while talking to her, and she had begun to notice how she never helped by sticking out her chest further.

"Hai, Taichou?"

He let out a small groan as he folded his arms. She nearly laughed at how authorative he looked. It seemed so out of place for someone so young. "Matsumoto, I know that these last few weeks have been difficult on you, but your attitude as of late has become an issue."

Her eyes widened slightly in surprise. It was true that she had been expecting something like this, but not from her own captain. "Yes... I-- Apologize, Hitsugaya-taichou," she muttered, doing her best to sound sincere. She knew that it was terrible for her to act as she was. There were so many people worse off then her; yet she just couldn't place her heart in it.

"Considering that Soul Society is recovering from such an event, we can't afford to have anyone sitting around doing nothing. Of course, there are exceptions," he explained, referring to the many patients emitted into the 4th squad's infirmary. "If you continue to perform this behavior, we will have to take action."

His bright turqoise eyes shone with a hint of guilt, and she glanced down to the floor in discomfort. "H-hai. I understand, Hitsugaya-taichou..."

The white-haired boy frowned at her slightly. It wasn't very often that she felt uncomfortable around someone like him. "Matsumoto..." She glanced up at him, and he let out a small sigh, quickly averting his gaze to his left. "I don't think it's the best idea for you to be here right now..."

"T-taichou?" she questioned, confused at his abrubtness. What did he mean by the fact she shouldn't be here?

He unfolded his arms, and held them firmly behind his back, "I may not be an expert, but I can tell that you are wasting away here." As much as she wanted to deny it, he was right. After the 3 captains had left, she had lost over 5 pounds strictly from drinking and walking around senselessly within the Soul Society. "You need to get out."

"Hitsugaya-taichou..." she muttered under her breath. Until about two seconds ago, she would have never believed that Hitsugaya Toushiro was capable of any sort of compassion towards her, even if it was only out of concern. Her frown was quickly replaced by a smile as she bent down, patting him gently on the head.

She noticed a small blush form on his cheeks, and she let out a small laugh, "Thanks Toushiro-kun."

"That's Histugaya-taichou to you!" he retorted, backing away from his lieutenant. "Don't think you're dismissed from your duties! Just take a break off in the human world or something! You're no use moping around here!"

The fiery haired woman gave the boy a small salute before straightening her posture, "Hai, Hitsugaya-_taichou._"

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She had promptly returned to her quarters (also known as the headquarters of the 10th divison), in order to pack her bags. She had some old beige suitcases that she had managed to maintain since her last visit to the human realm. She packed a spare kimono, several different shirts, her brush (which had suffered through years of damage), and several changes of undergarments. Matsumoto packed an entirely seperate bag for her cosmetic supplies, which needless to say, took up a lot of room.

Matsumoto Rangiku immediately ran to the edge of Seireitei and opened up a portal to the human world using Hai Neko. The doors slid open silently as her hell butterfly flew through, ensuring that the passage was safe. She lept through towards the light, blinking rapidly as she felt her head collide with solid concrete.

"Oww..." she groaned, bringing herself to her knees while rubbing the back of her head. At least she had ended up in the place that she wanted to. Last time she visited the human world, she had wanted to come to Karakura, but ended up over in the most northern part of Canada. Needless to say, that was not a very fun experience.

She glanced up at the sign in front of her, which read "Spiritual Station," and smirked in approval. If she wanted to go where she needed to, Urahara Kisuke would be the perfect person to ask.

"Owner! There's a weird shinigami lady lying outside of the shop!!!" she heard a loud voice shout from inside of the store, and she cringed slightly. Without a second to spare, a short red-haired boy slid the front doors open and ran outside. Following him was another short black-haired girl wearing a polka-dotted skirt. She subconciously praised the girl's fashion sense before tugging at her pink scarf.

"I need to talk to Urahara-tai--" she bit her tongue before repeating herself, "I need to talk to Urahara-san about something, little boy. Can you tell me where he is?"

The red-haired boy's expression darkened slightly as she called him a little boy, and she saw him reach for some sort of bat behind him. Regardless of the fact someone like him could cause literally no damage to such a shinigami as herself, the girl quickly held onto his arm, prompting him to stop his behavior immediately.

"Jinta... You know the owner would be angry if you hurt one of his customers..." she insisted meakly.

"Yeah, yeah, I know, dammit. You don't need to tell me that so much!" he retorted, hitting the girl on the head.

Just before Matsumoto could intervene, another voice shouted from behind them both, and she looked over in recognition, "Oy, what's with all the ruckus, you two?" None other then the previous captain of the 12th division. He let out a large yawn, placing his right hand over his striped hat while walking towards them.

"Urahara...-san, I have come to ask for your assistance," the orange-haired lieutenant spoke in an authorative manner while bowing slightly. Even though he had been exiled, he was far superior to her.

The blonde ex-shinigami glanced up at her face for a moment, then to her chest, and back to her face before responding. "Ahh, Matsumoto-san!!! Long time no see!" She nearly laughed at how casual he was now. Well, he always had been casual, except when he was a captain, it was his responsibility to actually carry out the instructions issued by the council.

"Er.. Yes, I suppose it has been a while. May I come in?"

He flicked out his fan as he gestured towards his shop, "by all means."

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As Tsukabishi Tessai placed down a tray of peppermint tea for both the owner and his guest, the expression on Urahara Kisuke's face could have easily been expressed as shock. His striped hat had been placed down in the center of the table, which gave her a clear view of the expression on his eyes. It contained a hint of knowledge that made her shrink away.

"You want me to let you into Hueco Mundo?" he questioned softly, as if reassuring himself what he had heard.

Her long orange hair fell over her shoulders, and she brushed a strand from her face. "Yes... There is someone I need to find."


End file.
